[I'm BaCCCCkkkk!!]

Hey hey! I'm back ^____^

So I haven't been on in awhile... here's my update..

1.My ex played me. He started dating someone else... but then they broke up... but I don't wanna be with him. Forget him.

2. I talk to Chris [Harvey] and Kyle from the show alot now! And I'm hanging out with Kyle this weekend most likely

3. School is.. well, school.

4. I've been kinda down lately T____T I'm just stressed out..

I really don't know what to type about.. I might get to see Cobra Starship in concert in May and I'm so excited!! But don't let my facade fool you. I'm actually not doing so great... but that's another story..

[I'm An OfFiCiAl CrUnK kId!!!!]

OMG so lastnight I saw Hollywood Undead, Senses Fail, Brokencyde, and Haste the Day in concert and it. was. AMAZING!!!

I even got to meet 2 members of Brokencyde and got my picture taken with them ^____^ And they signed my ticket. I'm so stoked!! And I met some really cool guys. But it was really weird because this guy started hitting on me and I'm totally not used to it, but he got my number and just called me... but he's 22 [I'm 17] and he lives like, two hours away. Hahaa. But he was dressed up as Johnny Scene *you probably have no clue what I'm talking about* and he got my attention because he was dancing crazy and I smiled at him so he motioned me over and kissed my head and hugged me and the first thing he said to me was "Dang, baby girl, you're FIIIIIINE!!" LMAO!!!! But he's totally hot. And he's really nice <3>

My ex and his girlfriend broke up and he wants to go out with me again O_____o but I don't think that would be a good decision for me.. I don't know yet..

So my life is pretty good right now ^____^ How are you guys??

[ GuEss WhAt?? I'm OnLiNe!! ]

Yay I'm online!! ^______^

Anyways, today was.. odd. My parents got into a fight so I took off and went to this place where I live and was just sorta chillin and making old people look at me funny lol. Then my mom came and got me and we went to the park and we just walked around and I took pictures. It was actually quite fun. But now my dad is missing *we got home and there was a note that said "you got what you wished for T_____T* and my sister is at her friend's house.. so blah =P

So my ex emailed me and wants to be friends.. not the ex who's on here but the other one. And I don't know how to react. I don't think we can be friends. He hurt me too bad..

I didn't have school today ^___^ I'm pretty happy. And now I'm just sitting here eating soup. Well, life is boring and I have nothing else to type. Later!

Oh, and I can officially open my mouth. There was a large like.. puss sack around my tooth *totally gross* and I popped it and it feels better. Bleh I know =P

[ LaSt PoSt FrOm ScHooL!! ]

So this will be my last post from school... then I won't be on everyday anymore T____T
It really sucks. I've become addicted to this site. And now I have to give up blogging everyday. But you guys will be fine without me. Just comment me whenever you think of me and when I get back on I'll reply to them all lol.

So Ryan hasn't called me in days and well.. I'm kinda glad. He's just.. odd. And I don't want to deal with him anymore.. But, because of exams, my lunch is the same as my ex's, and he always stares at me. I swear I'm gonna spork his eyes out. And then the other day I went into Matt's class to talk to him and my ex is like, "hey, Brandy" and I so wanted to turn around and be like, "since when are you allowed to speak to me??"

You see, things are messed up with him. As you might know from past posts, my ex wanted me back right before Christmas break. Then he started dating someone else. SO I'm totally bitter, but I have the right to be. And they're always together, holding onto eachother and making me want too gag. I dated him for over 2 years and let's just say he made me impure lol!! So I have a connection that isn't broken yet to him. I'm so sick of thinking of him and seeing his stupid face and crying because I can't have him. It's RIDICULOUS. And I need to get over it. She won. I lost. And well.. who even cares. He's not even a catch. I can do so much better.

Wow. That was waaay bitchy.

So I wrote a poem yesterday. Here it is...

The things I could never tell you

Are all locked inside my head

They're sure to remain inside

Even when I am dead.

The things I could never tell you

They tore us apart

And I sat idley by

As I ripped out your heart.

The things I could never tell you

They keep me up at night

The warm wetness soaks my cheeks

Even with lids locked tight.

The things I could never tell you

Always involved pain

I felt like by hurting myself

I pushed away your reign.

The things I could never tell you I still have blocked away

Pushing back those memories

To live another day.

The things I could never tell you

Made me walk alone

And pour my lust onto a knife

And shake me to the bone.

The things I could never tell you

Now I have to say

I know I'm still in love with you

But this is my last day.

What do you think? I should make a blog with all my poems. I write so many of them, yet hardly post them. Maybe I'll do that..

Well, this is farewell until next time. I love you guys so much. You're like family to me. My little sisters haha. Be safe and I promise I'll still be on here. Love you so so much!! <3

[ BC13 MoThEr FxCkErS!!! ]

Sorry Hairball. I didn't get your comment in time =(

OMG. Like.. OMG.

Matt *who makes snow angels for me* cut and dyed his hair and. it. looks. AMAZING!! I'll have to post a pic later. I almost died. Seriously. He was already cute.. now it's insane hahaha

Exams today and tomorrow... then this class is done.. and I won't be online everyday anymore :( I'm so sorry you guys. I'll try my hardest to get on as much as possible.

I really have nothing to type. Oh, my mouth hurts. That's something. I have to go to the dentist on Tuesday because my jaw is locking up and my mouth hurts :(

OMG OMG OMG!! I GOT TICKETS TO SEE HOLLYWOOD UNDEAD, BROKENCYDE, SENSES FAIL, AND HASTE THE DAY!!! For realz, I didn't think I was going but Kristin, my friend, is taking me. So think of me on the 14th because I'll be having a wicked awesome time ^____^

[ SeCrEt AdMiReRs ]

I just went to my account on myyearbook.com and found out that I currently have 6582 secret admirers. That is rather INSANE. And none of these people even know me.. haha. But I did mee this cool guy who lives like, ten minutes away from me and he's my age so that is pretty neat.

In band today all we did was watch Hairspray. I was happy. But there's no point in me being here today, I swear. Expect I have a test next block. Blah.

You know what really uber sucks? I am one percent away from being able to waive an exam. ONE PERCENT. I am pretty pissed off. And there are no more assignments in this class, so I can't get it up. School = suckage.

I have nothing to do right now and am quit bored. And I just got a comment from my favorite Fuzzball, but her layout doesn't have comments so I can't comment and tell her I'm online right now, too!!!

Well, I love you guys and hope you're both doing amazingly awesometastical. Later.

[ HaPPy BiRtHdAy, Dr. SeUsS! ]

Pfft. I HATE Dr. Seuss. Those books are messed up. They're like, trippy. And totally ridiculous...

Sorry. That was random. But what did you expect from me, what did you expect from me? *sings Senses Fail*

Anyways, I ended up hanging out with Ryan on Saturday but like... things are getting WEIRD. I mean, he's into pain. And he knows I'm into pain. So he tries to turn me on by hurting me. He seriously bit me on the neck and dug his nails into my neck and shit. It was crazy. And all we were doing was sitting there. For real, we haven't even made out or anything, I promise, but he just thinks it's ok to try to hurt me. SO I lied and said I needed to go home early. Plus he flipped out because I said I wouldn't be with someone who was joining the National Guard and he's like, "so I'm losing you..." And got out of the car and took off. BUT I'M NOT HIS. For real, we're not together. I don't know what to do anymore. Maybe Denny was right....

I have exams this week and it sucks. I hate exams. And I can't waive this trimester because my grades aren't good enough *I have a B+ in digital photography and I need a A- to waive* BLAH =P

What else is going on....

I'm thoroughly convinced that my mother is going crazy. She yells at me about everything. I mean EVERYTHING. And I swear if I don't get out of that house soon I'll commit suicide. I can't take it. Daniel wants me to move out of there when I'm 18.. he said I could come stay with him. That'd be nice.. but I can't do that because of college...

Ugh.