My year... A Thoughtful Recap

Since it's almost the end of the year, I've decided to post a list of pros and cons of the past year. This will only include my top 5 though... Otherwise, I could ramble for days. Soo.. here we go!

Pros
1. Shows!!- This year I went to alot of really good shows and had amazing times at all of them! (I saw Rent, Def Leppard, Billy Idol, New Found Glory, 4 Year Strong, Crime in Stereo, International Super Heros of Hardcore, A Day to Remember, Cute is what we Aim For, Boys Like Girls, The Graduate, The White Tie Affair, Cobra Starship, Forever the Sickest Kids, Sing It Loud, and Hit The Lights!!)

2. Mocospace- I got into the fad and became obsessed. I've made some really good friends on there that I cannot live without (Rex, Robert, Ron, Cookie, Dan...)

3. Robert Becker - Robert Becker is a boy at my school that I met this year. He has changed my life and I cannot see life without him <3

4. Breaking Dawn and the Twilight movie- The overall Twilight series made this year awesome. And standing in line for three hours for the last book and reading all 754 pages in a day made the wait for the last book worth while :)

5. Meeting the lead singer of Cute is What We Aim for, The White Tie Affair, and the guitarist from Sing It Loud- That is self explanitory. The most fun was meeting the lead signer of TWTA. He is so amazing, he signed my picture, took a pic with me, talked to me for a long time, and hugged me! He was soo sweet!

Cons
1. I got dumped :( - Me and my boyfriend of 2 years and 2 months broke up in July and it pretty much sucked. I'm still in awe. Plus it was totally my fault....

2. Mocospace drama- Ugh. That site is so good for this... especially the Rex stuff.....

3. THE MEDIC DROID BROKE UP!!- one of my favorite bands, The Medic Droid, broke up. This actually happened on Dec. 17th, so I'm still in mourning. R.I.P. TMD :'(

4. Internet was shut off on my phone- Let's just say I messed up, got caught, and my internet was shut off. And now my parents dont trust me... which fxckin bites.

5. The Starting Line broke up and I missed some good shows- The first is self explainatory. The second.. I missed seeing Senses Fail, Escape the Fate, Bullet for my Valentine, Chiodos, and Silverstein in concert.. which sucked.. but the shows I saw made up for it.

So that's my year. There are probably more events but I don't wanna mess with thinking of those. Next I need to decide a New Years Resolution.. oh joy. I'll keep you posted..

Oh and uh.. Merry Christmas.. or whatever you celebrate.

And a smile can only hide so much...

Ok, so the original idea of this blog was to post my poetry.. but I never wanna take the time to do that. So instead I'll just ramble on and on on here about stuff no one cares about!

Today has been such a weird day. First off, Robert and Dakota brought me Christmas presents that totally rock ^_^ And Kayla and Kim brought me little gifts, too. So I'm really happy.

But, this is when it gets weird. Last night I was talking to Dennny (my ex bf) about my other ex, Dakota (which is a different Dakota than the one who brought me a gift). I was telling him how I have no closure when it comes to him since we broke up in July over the phone and haven't spoken face-to-face since. Well, I went down the hall to give Melissa her present and came back to see Robert and Renae talking to him. So I finally got my chance to pull him aside and apologize for all the stupid shxt that I did that made us break up. THEN, before he went to class, he said "This is the last hug you'll get from me," and hugged me ," And this is the last kiss you'll get from me," and KISSED ME. Now I'm really confused. He doesn't think we can be friends because he says I'm too like, awesome to be around without him being in love with me, and I hate being in this school and pretending like those two years were nothing. So I guess I'll go back to pretending to be ok and ignore it. God. Why did I have to mess everything up? I swear we'd still be together if I never had internet on my phone. But I also met so many people that I care about sooo much... Like Rex (even if I got in mucho trouble because of him) and Robert (not the one mentioned above. This one lives in Califonia and is totally the shizz. I mean it. He's like, one of my favorite people ever. He makes me soo happy ^_^) and Cookie and Dan and Ron... the list goes on and on. I love them all so much. But it doesn't change anything. I messed up. I ruined my relationship with Dakota. And I have to deal with it. I just pray he actually accepted my apology, because I meant it with all of my heart...

It's that "festive" time of year...

So the time is coming upon us. Yeppers. It's almost Christmas... which, to many, is an important holiday to celebrate the birth of Christ and all that good stuff. Yeah, stop laughing. I know it's a commercial holiday to sell shxt to people and buy random junk for your loved ones.. stuff that you yourself would never want. But don't get me wrong.. there are some good meanings behind Christmas. I, myself, don't follow these, though, because, well... I'm not Christian. And that sentence had way too many commas... Anyways, Christmas, to me, is about greed. We all make our dumb lists that have a bunch of crap on them and hand them out, then we bxtch and complain when we don't get what we want...

Well, this is America, after all...

I really just typed this to show off the picture I took in digital photography. So uh.. Happy Holidays.. and all that good stuff...

"..We're not falling in love, we're just falling apart.." Well, I am. He isn't...

So Friday sucked. I don't know any other way of putting it. Let me retell the story.. but to make it easier and protect the not-so-innocent, I shall change the names. I'll use names from.. Twilight. Yes, Twilight. But don't follow this like the character relationships in Twilight, or this will get really fxcked up. Here it goes...

SO Bella likes Edward. Edward has always acted like he liked Bella, too. And he would do anything for her. Bella knows this and time and time again is marveled in his wonderfulness. BUT Edward doesn't really like Bella. Oh no. Edward likes... Alice. Yeah. I'll use that name... BUTTTT Alice just got a new boyfriend.. named Jacob (this is starting to get weird.. stop thinking of it like in Twilight, people. These are purely names..) so Edward is sad and decides to tell BELLA, of all people, about how he's feeling and goes into details. This crushes Bella (duh) because Bella is practically in love with Edward. Edward knows this but doesn't seem to give a purple mountain's majesty. So Edward apologizes to Bella, and says he didn't mean to hurt her. But I.. I mean Bella... is still crushed, because sorry doesn't change something like that. But Bella is really mad at herself for falling for Edward, who is far too good for her anyways, and wishes she could get over him, but she knows she can't. Especially when she rides the same bus as Edward.. and sits with Edward.. and is always with Edward...

Ok. I feel a little better. Not much though. Thank you, Stephanie Meyer, for the usage of your character's names...

A little of an introduction...

So, in tradition to starting a new blog, I've decided to post an actual post to start this thing off. This will be used mostly for things I've wrote, mostly poems, but from time to time I may take the time to tell you about my life. Well, I'm Brandy, aka NeOn. I'm 17 and live in Michigan. I'm a senior at Lowell High School and am pretty intelligent. My interests include music, writing, drawing, musicals, and pretty much anything artistic. I also rule at Guitar Hero ^_^. I play the clarinet, guitar, and keyboard. My style is a bit alternative, I guess you could say..[a lot of black]. My favorite passtime is going to shows, especially the ones downtown at The Intersection, where I can mosh it up and show up to school the next day with battle wounds. My motto is you can tell a good show by a good bruise ha, ha.
Another thing that is very important to know about me deals with my stances on issues. I'm very liberal. I'm also atheist. I can't stand talking to people about religion, unless is deals with Paganism, which I spent many years following. I'm also totally and 100% straight edge. I draw X's on my hands almost everyday and I have never done any sort of drug or drank alcohol, and talking to me about your usage will get you ignored.
Anyways, feel free to comment. I look forward to speaking to you. You can also hit me up on Facebook (ask me) or Mocospace (look up xxxlovelessxx).

xxNeOn.MaSSaCrEx