[ToO cOLd To FuNcTiOn!!]

SO it's like, -8 degress F out today. It's ridiculous T__T This is what it looks like from the hill at my school ------------------------------>

Hmph. I don't know what to type about today because.. well.. I'm in a bad mood and don't wanna type out everything that's bothering me..

Actually, I will. I'll spill my guts..

First off, I wanted to talk to Jeremy last night but he's out of minutes.. so I called Ian and guess who answered? Jeremy ^_^ But then he had to go so he said he'd call back and I was like yeah right. You always say that. So he said he PROMISED and if he didn't call he'd cut off his penis and mail it to me O...o But guess what? He never called. I hate guys X_X

And my ex is still lying about me. Now he told his new girlfriend that I emailed him but that's all. Uhm, I only emailed him after HE CALLED ME AND TOLD ME TO. GAHH!!

Hmm.. what else...

School is so stressful! I'm sick of reading Shakespeare and stuff for novel and blah blah. Life is boring and school makes it even worse..

So back to the Jeremy thing.. sorry, it's bugging me.. I was watching American Idol lastnight and I was beginning to feel an anxiety attack coming on.. the whole deep breathing, eyes watering, throat closing effect... but I was like "oh no. Jeremy will call so I can't start to freak out because I'll scare him" so I just kept it in. Then he never called. So I have all this built up emotion crap in me right now and I just. wanna. scream!!!!!!!!!

But yesterday Mrs. Swift switched our seats.. hopefully not permanatly.. and we had to work in groups and Matt's group was next to mine so I could still talk and see him without staring at the back of his head.. and everytime I looked at him, he was looking back ^__^ He has this head nod-wink thing he does to me.. it drives me crazy..and he always makes me smile. It's a good feeling. BUT I have a feeling nothing will come of this >.<

My sister's birthday party is on Sunday. I invited Robert to come and hopefully keep me company but I'm afraid to meet his mom. I have a feeling that she won't like me.

I just noticed I'm a name dropper. It's bad. I just have alot of guy friends.. good luck keeping track. it's really funny though because when I get into a rant and mention tons of guys, Robert actually keeps track. AND remembers. Although he asked me to write them down so he's sure he won't forget. He's such a sweetie...

<3

[UpDaTe!]

So yesterday's post was err... pointless?? Yeah, pretty much. So here's the update on how I am..

Well, Dakota (my ex) called me again on Monday and we talked for like, an hour and a half. Things are so weird about him.. and he's lying to his girlfriend.. saying he doesn't think of me.. and he doesn't talk to me.. and blah blah blah. I swear he doesn't really care about her because he still cares so much for me. Maybe I'm naive but whatev. He's just stupid.

There's a dance coming up on Feb. 7th apparently. I didn't know because well.. I don't really care about those things. BUT Dakota is taking Katie which kinda sucks -___- So I'm thinking maybe I should make an appearence?? But then I have to go dress shopping with my mom and she'll see my scars.. so no fun.

Plus the only guy of interest here.. the one from the pic below.. probably doesn't know I exist on any level besides a friend.. I really wanna go with Jeremy, Ian's friend, but he already graduated and he doesn't have his license AND he has never gone to my school.. so I'd have to fill out a form for him to come.. and it'd be weird to be like ,"Hey Ian.. I know you used to go here and all but can you bring your friend because he totally pwns over you??" Hahahahahah ^__^

Ugh. Forget guys. They all suck. The End.

Real men make.. snowangels?

So I was walking around the school today complaining about not having anything to take pics of.. then my friend Matt came from KCTC and I was like "Yay! I can hang out with him ^__^" (I have a thing for Matt.. I don't know if he knows that though O__O) So we're hanging out.. skipping class.. then he's like, "I'll go outside and make a snow angel for you if you let me back in.." So I rolled my eyes because if he made one he'd be wet all day and I didn't believe he'd so it.. well, he did. As you can see *__* He's so adorable <3

Next block I sit behind him and I won't be able to control my laughing.. he will be dripping wet and no one will know why.. except me!! =)

Wow. Sorry about yesterday's rant..

Haha I read yesterday's post.. I need to get over this shxt. I mean, it's not good for me.. Not. At. All.

So I figured out yesterday that I can't wear a short or even semi-short dress to prom IF I go.. will I go? Probably not. Because no one likes me *emo tears* But if I wanna do I can't wear a cute dress because..well.. I have too many cuts on my legs now.. Yepp, I am a cutter. Haha. Don't worry. Stop biting your lip, widening your eyes, and all that fun stuff people do when they find out. It's really no big deal. I've done it since 7th grade.. so I'm a pro [god that's messed up]. It's really ok though. I've never been hospitalized and I'm careful.. so no worries.. Except if my parents find out I'm still doing it..

Ahhh no worries.. It'll be okey dokey..

On another note, I forgot all of my rings at home today x_x I feel so weird.. but I acutally look really cute today so it's ok!!

So if you're reading this, comment me. Let me know. Because I have one follower.. and no one else seems to know I exist!! It would be nice to make some uh friends..

<3

GAAAAAH!! So people. Need. To. Die.

I am now taking on the role of homewrecker. And if I cannot complete this task, my life has no meaning..

What am I talking about??
... fxck if I know...
Wait. I DO know. So my ex.. yeah.. the one who kissed me before break.. has a new girlfriend.

WHAT??

I know. It's messed up. I don't understand why he thinks he can replace me with her. There's NO COMPARING ME TO HER!!! I am what he wants. I know this for a mother fxcking fact!! And if not, why does he call me more now than ever before? Because he wants me. Eat that, bitch.

Ugh. Bad mood. I just wish he'd realize that I'm not playing. I am sorry. And I wanna fix it.

"What will it take to make you understand that I.. I'm not lying when I say I need you.."

I hate myself for this soo much... but she doesn't deserve him. She is just flirting. I have been here. I know him. I know everything about him. I know his downfalls.. his strong points...

I TOOK HIS VIRGINITY!! HE'S MINE >=O

Oh wow. I'm really really on a tangent. I'm gonna go before I say more crap that I'll regret tomorrow! But no one I know reads this anyways.. haha

This totally made my day ^_^

(\__/)
(O.o )
(> < ) This Is Bunny. Copy Bunny into your signature to help him on his way to world domination.

DROP THE GIRL, She's the only reason she's got you believing it's love..

So remember that post about my ex and me talking to him and blah blah blah? Well he has a new girlfriend.. yeah. All that happened the day before break.. he asked her out the day after break...

Story.Of.My.Life.

He called me last night and we talked for like, an hour and a half. And I couldn't. stop. crying. I don't know why, but this is really effecting me. But he asked me not to interfere and said he will never stop caring for me, so I feel a little better. Plus I fxcked this up. There's not much I can do now except wait.

Jeremy called last night. He's a friend of Ian's who is totally amazing. He helped me a lot. And he is trying to get me to move to with him and Ian this summer to Mackinac.. ha ha yeah right.

I am way too tired to continue typing. But I'll leave you with this amazing picture of me. My friend, Katy took it and photoshopped it. Bask in it's glory, bitches.